Chapter 56
WETRIED TRANSLATIONS
[ Translation - Aren ]
I'm a Reporter, Please let me get off the Stage
________________________________________________________________________
Chapter 56
―Hello~
―Excuse us~
As soon as people entered, they let out plenty of ‘Wooow~” sounds of admiration.
At the very least, they were mindful of the cameras like proper entertainers.
Even though the dormitory was empty, they had enough common sense to assume there were cameras installed.
However.
There was always one person who defied social norms and remained completely faithful to their desires.
Someone who threw themselves onto a bed as soon as he arrived.
[Yeeun, lying down as soon as he enters]
Thank god.
At least I didn’t do anything that unlikeable.
It was kind of reassuring to have Yeeun around.
Even if my image completely crashed, at least he would always make sure to lower the bar a notch deeper
―Oh~ a dorm~
Another empty room’s door swung open.
It was Baekgyeom.
For some reason, I felt even more nervous than when I had appeared.
―Hello~ You’re J.U., right?
―Yes, that’s right! Nice to meet you! You’re Baekgyeom, right?
Baekgyeom seriously needed to be sent to a speech academy someday.
It was supposed to be a moment where they greeted each other as equals.
But somehow, Baekgyeom made it look like he was ordering around a subordinate.
It was kind of concerning.
―Do you know how this program is going to be structured?
―No? No idea. I feel like the producers are deliberately keeping it from us.
―Right? I don’t know either, haha.
―Well then…… Should we lie down?
‘No!!! Stop lying down!!!’
[Baekgyeom, lying down just 30 minutes after arrival]
“Ha, haha……”
Baekgyeom, who was watching the monitoring footage, let out an awkward laugh.
I couldn’t bring myself to say anything to him.
But I did summon every ounce of energy in my body to imagine smacking him over his head.
Baekgyeom was probably imagining getting smacked by me as well.
―It was a bit strange not being told anything…… But I just trusted that the producers must have some kind of plan.
A brief clip of VOV’s Yunho’s solo interview appeared.
Judging by the genuinely bewildered expression on his face…… VOV must have been dragged here without even getting a script.
Which only made Chenstin seem even more suspicious.
[Confused idols]
―It’s been such a long time since I last went to a training camp…… Haha.
VOV’s Euimin had a similar energy to me.
That stiff atmosphere just screamed exhaustion.
……Hmm, I felt like I was starting to understand why the production team came up with this show.
―Lee Kyubin is entering. One, two, three.
―Waaah~
It wasn’t an overwhelming cheer, nor was it an awkward silence. Just the definition of ‘moderate’.
―Hello, everyone. I’m actor Lee Kyubin.
―Hello~!
―Good evening.
Even back then, I thought something felt off about this scene.
And watching it now, it really was strange.
All those mismatched greetings
It made the whole scene look messy, yet they still aired it as is.
―I’m sure most of you weren’t told much about what <Ultimate Idol> actually is about before coming here…… This program was designed to reignite the passion that may have cooled in your hearts.
As soon as Lee Kyubin finished saying that, the cameras immediately zoomed in on the idols’ faces.
[Nervous]
First, wide-eyed Munsu from Chenstin.
Then IONER’s Yeeun, whose expression didn’t change at all.
―While gaining wealth and popularity can help you win more love from fans, those alone don’t define being the ‘Ultimate’ idol.
Lee Kyubin’s long-winded speech continued.
And at that moment, the screen switched suddenly.
A stark white interview room appeared.
―To be honest, I think it’s the ‘sales’?
―Haha……
It was me.
I appeared on screen, awkwardly laughing at the writer’s question.
This was from my interview yesterday morning.
They had sneakily spliced my response right after Lee Kyubin’s line about ‘money’.
“Hoh……”
Haram let out a surprised sound while watching my interview.
Meanwhile, I was probably sitting there with a completely unreadable expression.
I already knew the production team was manipulative, but seeing it like this, I had to admit they were downright cunning.
I might be pretty crafty myself, but the people in the broadcasting industry were just completely out of their mind.
―Think of it as going back to your trainee days, but with the sharpness and experience you gained since then. Please give it your all.
From then on, the footage mainly focused on Lee Kyubin as he explained the show’s format and rules, switching between shots of him and reaction shots of us idols.
Whether it was luck or misfortune, I wasn’t shown even once.
―The format of this program is simple. Once the cue signal is given, there will be no retakes.…… There will be no scripts…… The mission will be given every Sunday…… You will have five days to prepare…… Please show us your best.
After Kyubin’s speech ended, the scene transitioned again.
Similar to before, a compilation of individual idol interviews played.
―There really weren't any cue signs. I was so shocked.
―I’ve never done a show like this before, so I was super nervous……
―The production team must be working really hard……
―Wait, are they filming inside the rooms too? Where are we supposed to change clothes?
―Not having a phone is kind of inconvenient.
The first three responses were clearly positive PR, while the last two were bait for hate comments.
None of the first three came from our team.
Two were from Chenstin, and one was from IONER.
Among the last two……
The last speaker was Yoon Sanho.
Sanho was starting to resemble Baekgyeom a little too much for my liking.
Should I sew his mouth shut in advance?
―Have you heard about the term ‘Dead-eyed idols’?
―Yeah, I saw it in articles…… It made me reflect a lot and feel sorry.
VOV’s Yeonho muttered with his head lowered.
His tone didn’t match his words at all, to the point that it was concerning.
―How do you feel about the show’s purpose now that you know it?
―I should do well…… Make sure not to disappoint the fans. Something like that. Yeah.
It was Haram’s interview.
He didn’t sound extremely indifferent, but he didn’t seem deeply remorseful either.
―You laid down on the bed as soon as you arrived.
―……Wouldn’t anyone do that?
Yeeun had apparently decided to self-destruct.
―Have you ever regretted becoming an idol?
―……I guess I should say no?
That was Loop7’s Heerae.
Honesty could be a double edged sword..
I could imagine how disheartening that would be for fans to hear.
―Do you know the term ‘failed idol’?
―……Are you referring to us?
This time, it was Loop7’s Kei.
Kei had just said that, and as he opened his mouth to add something more the interview sequence was cut off.
What a brutal editing choice.
He probably had a meaningful explanation lined up after that.
The footage returned to the studio recording.
Lee Kyubin looked around at us before speaking.
―However, you’ll now have to take off those outfits right here.
The camera zoomed in on two members of IONER.
One of them leaned in to whisper something to the other.
―What kind of bullshi……
―Hey, the cameras are rolling.
Huh.
Those two were sitting right next to me.
I had overheard them at the time and silently agreed, but……
I didn’t expect this to actually make it into the broadcast. They were going to get roasted good for this.
“Huh.”
Behind me, I heard Tae Oh let out a sharp breath.
He was probably just as shocked as I was.
―Honestly! Honestly, I was a little flustered. They told us to come wearing our stage outfits, but then asked us to take them off immediately after……
In the (patched-together) interview segment, Heerae was shown fumbling through an excuse, practically digging his own grave.
―How do you feel about the uniforms?
―It’s comfortable.
This time, it was Haedun’s interview.
It was so short that it came off as incredibly insincere.
For someone saying they liked something, he sure looked pissed.
Aside from occasionally inserting interviews, the show was following a fairly straightforward chronological order.
The audition reenactment mission began, starting with Bang Junho, followed by several other idols.
Of course, not every idol’s performance was shown.
From what I could tell, only about one in five got actual screen time.
Getting cut meant losing out big time.
Somewhere along the way, as I watched, I realized I had fully embraced the mindset of a desperate, attention-starved, washed-up idol eager to be devoured by this monstrous broadcast.
―And next, we have Haedun-nim of WEEKANIZ.
“It’s Haedun-hyung!”
Yoon Sanho shouted.
I felt a wave of relief.
Honestly, aside from my first entrance, I had barely been on-screen.
And that first appearance was pretty awkward. I looked so uncomfortable that I couldn’t stop worrying about it.
They said hate comments were better than no comments at all.
At least with Haedun getting some screen time, WEEKANIZ might not end up as a complete filler this episode.
―Wow, Haedun-nim, that was incredible.
Haedun’s audition stage passed without a hitch.
Which was actually perfect.
His fluid motions that made it seem like he didn’t have joints were so smooth that they left everyone in awe.
―This is an audition for EOO Entertainment.
―Whoa, he was aiming for EOO?
―I had no idea.
They made sure to capture everyone’s surprised reactions to Haedun’s statement.
―Do you regret not making it into EOO?
―……I don’t think I would’ve gotten in even if I had done better.
Headun’s individual interview popped up immediately after.
That was a painfully realistic answer.
It was practically resignation at this point but…… as someone with a corporate background, I completely understood.
EOO might have found someone like Haedun interesting, but they would never have seen him as valuable. That much was obvious.
Even young Haedun probably knew that.
Still, giving up on his love for lyrical hip-hop, a genre that truly expressed his identity, just for a chance to be an idol didn’t seem like an option for him.
―Then what if EOO offered you a spot now? Would you take it?
―……Hmm. I……
Haedun hesitated for a moment.
Hesitated? Bro, even if you are thinking about it, at least pretend like you’re not!
Just as Haedun paused briefly and opened his mouth to answer…
[Find out in one minute]
The show cut to commercials.
“……What did you say?”
“What did you say?”
Tae Oh, Haram, and Ire all blurted out the same question.
“……”
Haedun quietly turned his head away.
The way he did it, like he’d just spotted something really annoying, was rather shocking.
“It’s not like that.”
Headun muttered in a low voice.
None of the members pressed him any further.
Honestly, making a big deal out of this would be dangerous.
Right now, this place almost felt like an interrogation room.
The blaring TV commercial filled the silence.
Everyone was still shaken from the brutal interview edits and the show’s aggressive approach, exceeding our every expectation.
Especially that ‘What kind of bullshi—” comment earlier had definitely left quite an impact on the members.
This broadcast clearly had no intention of playing by the usual unwritten rules like ‘It’s TV, they’ll edit out the worst parts at least’.
I fell into deep thought.
In a program like this, how were we supposed to survive?
And just like that, my train of thought took a completely different turn.
I blankly stared at the commercials before I opened my mouth.
“……But honestly, if EOO made an offer like that, shouldn’t he take it?”
“……What?”
_
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