Chapter 234

Chapter 234

Between me and Jafa, there was an assortment of refreshments. They were snacks and drinks produced by Jafa Master Sergeant’s food company.  

Clatter.  

I pulled the plate of cookies closer and picked up a snake-shaped one.  

Crunch.  

It had a damp yet addictive taste. Rather than thinking it was delicious, I found myself wanting more.  

Jafa had a talent for utilizing taste and smell. Then again, the entire Tajirun race excelled in those senses. They could even detect subtle hormonal changes to perceive others' emotions.  

There were differences between species. And there were also differences between individuals. Sometimes, individual differences could surpass those between species.  

A human could be more like a Tajirun, just as a Tajirun could be more like a human.  

"You're eating the snacks I prepared," Jafa remarked, watching my actions. Her vertical pupils had narrowed, and her slightly parted lips revealed a forked tongue flicking in and out at regular intervals.  

"I figured you wouldn't pull any cheap tricks. This much means I trust you to some extent."  

We were wary of each other, careful not to reveal our weaknesses. But that didn’t mean we were enemies. We simply kept the possibility in mind.  

'A relationship that would turn hostile if our goals and interests clashed.'  

Yes, that was the proper way to define it. If she ever stood against my interests, she would become my enemy at any time.  

…That was why I had to remain vigilant.  

'I do feel the occasional urge to lay everything out and ask for cooperation.'  

If my mind had been even slightly softer, I might have done so. But that would be no different from belonging to Jafa. I would be crushed under the weight of dependence, giving up my freedom and enslaving myself.  

I could confide in Jafa, expose my weaknesses, and become a capable subordinate. Jafa would, within her limits, actively support me. It would lighten my burdens, make things easier.  

But freedom had nothing to do with happiness or comfort.  

To me, freedom meant choosing between the worst and the lesser evil based on my own judgment—and bearing the full consequences of that choice.  

To use free will only to seek happiness and comfort was nothing more than being a slave to instinct. That kind of freedom didn’t deserve respect. The moment life became difficult, such people would abandon their so-called freedom. Because what they truly desired wasn’t freedom—it was comfort.  

The value of freedom lay not in the pursuit of happiness and ease, but in the ability to choose the thornier path.  

'I have chosen to stand on equal footing with Jafa.'

I know full well how difficult this path is. I have to maneuver around that cunning and capable Tajirun while tracking Kinuan and finding Giselle.  

Bzzzz.  

A ringing noise echoed in my ears. My head felt hot.  

I remained acutely aware of the Equessians’ gazes and gestures. If they showed any signs of preparing to attack, I would react immediately.  

"Luka, what do you think is the best way to hide one’s shame and secrets?"  

"Just erase them physically. Whether it's a record or a person, it's best to deal with it before it spreads out of control."  

"Hoyot, hoyot. As expected, you're remarkable. Luka, you're outstanding. Anyone would want to keep you by their side. But the problem is, you have no hesitation in biting the hand that tries to leash you."  

Jafa clicked the claws of both hands together.  

"I'm not stupid enough to entrust my life to just anyone."  

"But people do it so easily. They willingly hand over their freedom to a power that whispers sweet promises. Not because they're pure-hearted and trust their rulers, but because they want comfort. They entrust their very selves to those who preach a rosy future without proof or guarantee."  

Jafa gestured toward En with her chin. I watched their signals and movements sharply.  

En entered an adjacent room in the office, then returned, pushing a chair equipped with complex electronic devices into the center of the office.  

'A virtual reality device.'  

Scanning over the electronics, I determined it was meant for simulations.  

"So Paolo Kwan’s legacy doesn’t exist physically."  

"That’s right. It was the first thing I took care of after Paolo died. I incinerated and erased anything that could become a liability. His legacy exists only in my mind. That’s how you keep secrets safe."  

Jafa must have extracted portions of her memory.  

'That explains why preparing the legacy took time. And if it's stored like this, even Kinuan would have a hard time stealing it.'  

Jafa slipped her fingers into her sleeve and retrieved a small chip between her long claws.  

"This is a one-time-use data chip. The moment you access it, the data will begin deleting sequentially. There's no rewind function, so you’ll need to focus. Not that it matters for someone like you, Luka."  

Jafa inserted the chip into the simulation device. The machine powered on, its indicator lights blinking.  

"So you're telling me to sit here and watch your memories."  

I couldn’t help but twitch my lips.  

"Hoyoooot, I'm taking just as much of a risk myself."

In virtual reality, external stimuli become dull. The deeper the immersion, the blurrier one's sense of reality.  

‘Watching a simulation recording while Equessian mercenaries are glaring at me…’  

It was the kind of reckless act that required nerves of steel.  

…And reckless acts were something I excelled at. Besides, I was fairly certain they wouldn’t attack me.  

‘If their only goal was to eliminate me, there would be no need for all this.’  

Jafa had truly set the stage to show me her memories. At the same time, she was watching to see how much risk I was willing to take.  

‘The key is how much of her memory she’s actually revealing. She could be showing only what benefits her. If she’s hiding something, I’ll have to infer it myself.’  

I walked over and sat in the simulation chair. As I leaned back, the chair reclined comfortably.  

"I’ve said this multiple times, but these memories are unrelated to tracking Kinuan. At least, that’s my understanding. It’s not worth the risk for you. They only contain my shame and weaknesses."  

"And as I’ve also said multiple times, it’s up to me to decide whether it’s useful or not."  

"I expected you’d say that."  

I put on the simulation helmet. The electrodes inside adhered to my head. The screen covering my vision flickered with irregular bursts of light.  

I let myself focus on the stimuli. My body felt damp, sinking. Reality drifted away.  

The layer of reality shattered, and I embraced an unfamiliar sensation.  

Jafa’s memories welcomed me.  

*         *         *  

Jafa’s first memory began in a wasteland.  

She was a Tajirun. Naturally, her brain structure was different from mine as a human. Even though the memory had been adjusted for compatibility with a human brain, the simulation depth was shallow.  

I didn’t feel like I was Jafa at all. The fine sensory details were missing—I couldn’t even smell the wasteland.  

Whoooosh.  

A sandstorm swept across my vision—or rather, Jafa’s vision—obscuring it in an empty haze.  

"…‘Jafa.’"  

A rusty voice rang out.  

"Shut up."  

Jafa replied. The Tajirunese words started with static interference, distorting before smoothly translating into a language I could understand.  

‘The viewpoint is low.’  

Tajiruns were taller than humans, but Jafa seemed to be in her adolescent years.  

"Ah… over there… I think my guts just fell out."  

"W-what?"  

Only then did Jafa, startled, turn to look at the boy she had been supporting.

The boy's face was familiar.  

‘The Menoan Guard Commander.’  

That twin had once been Jafa’s lover. He was the boy who had died protecting Jafa from his family's pursuit.  

His condition was wretched—he was little more than a bundle of rags. His combat uniform was in tatters, and blood was seeping from his poorly treated abdomen.  

"It was a joke. I just wanted to see your face. You’ve been staring straight ahead this whole time."  

The bloodied boy smiled.  

"Just shut up and save your strength. Once we reach Border City… the pursuers won’t be able to find us so easily. We’ll be able to get you treated."  

The Jafa I knew was cautious and cunning. But the Jafa here was nothing more than a child crushed by anxiety.  

"You have money for treatment?"  

"…I’ll figure something out."  

Jafa supported the boy as they trudged through the wasteland. But his steps grew heavier, as if the ground itself were pulling him down.  

"I’m feeling a little tired. Go on ahead. I’ll rest for a bit and catch up."  

The boy’s complexion was pale as he spoke.  

"You still have that turned-off comms device, right? If you contact them now and turn me in—"  

"Don’t say something so stupid. If I do that, we both die. I came here fully prepared for that possibility."  

"Why? Why go that far?"  

Jafa’s voice was filled with reproach.  

"You’re really asking? I save your life, and this is how you treat me?"  

"I’m a Tajirun. To human eyes, my appearance is grotesque."  

"I was raised in the Menoa family from infancy. Not once in my life have I thought a Tajirun’s appearance was disgusting. You’re beautiful—especially the angle of your triangular head. It’s artistic."  

The way he explained it in such detail made it clear that he truly meant it.  

"It’s all my fault. I should never have approached you. This is all because of me."  

Jafa blamed herself. She was surely crying.  

"Haha, you’re smart, but you’re also an idiot. Ugh…"  

The boy laughed, then clutched his stomach. He took a moment to steady his breathing before continuing.  

"…You didn’t approach me. I was the one who lured you in. Do you really think it was a coincidence that we kept running into each other on the mothership? Our living spaces were entirely different."  

"What…?"  

"You wouldn’t remember. A proud Tajirun girl once approached me with a snack in hand. She asked an elder, ‘Is this the person who will protect me from now on?’"  

"That was…"

"I know. You gave snacks to the other trainees too. But for me, that day was special. You told me, ‘I’ll give you this, so train well and protect me properly.’"  

"I wasn’t thinking about you specifically when I did that. You all looked miserable going through that grueling training."  

"A rare sense of compassion for a Tajirun. That’s what makes you special. And I… I wanted to be someone special to you."  

The simulation’s depth was shallow, dulling the senses. Yet, I could clearly feel the boy’s life fading away. His light was vanishing at an alarming rate.  

"Stop… stop talking. We can talk about this later."  

"There is no later."  

The boy was young, but he was also a warrior who had undergone harsh training. He knew his condition objectively.  

"You have to live."  

"No, you have to live. Not as Jaspiekedera, but as ‘Jafa.’ If you live on with the nickname I gave you, then my life will have meant something."  

And Jafa would never be able to forget this boy for the rest of her life.  

"Please… don’t do this."  

"I’m worried about you. I don’t know much about the outside world either. But it’s bound to be just as brutal—if not worse—than the Menoa family. You’re a special Tajirun. I can’t even begin to imagine the hardships you’ll face."  

"I…"  

Before Jafa could respond, the boy’s head slumped forward.  

Thud.  

He collapsed, his weight dragging Jafa down with him.  

The memory of the wasteland ended there.

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